HOLY CRAP

That's how I'm feeling. We still can't quite believe it's true. Even after a 4th pregnancy test which I took this morning and the line was no longer faint, I still haven't digested it. I'm starting to feel the excitement of picking a name, wondering what it he/she will look like, seeing him/her on an ultrasound for the first time, etc etc. On the other hand, I've already started worrying about its health, having amniocentesis again (which I had a REALLY hard time with emotionally with my 2nd) and of course the weight that I will probably gain.

I gained about 45 pounds with my first 2 pregnancies (each!) and I just CANT do that again. I got up to 320 with Matthew and my legs and hips just hated me at the end. Plus, carrying a 35 pound child up the stairs when you're over 300 pounds and pregnant just isn't fun.

Yes, I'm definitely disappointed that my weight loss goals have to be put on hold (temporarily mind you), but I'm also bound and determined that I will gain the least amount of weight I can by eating healthy and exercising. I definitely wont put this child in any danger by trying to lose weight while pregnant, but I'm hoping that by keeping myself in check and not eating for 2 or 3 or 4 as I sometimes did with my first 2 pregnancies; that I can end up not to far from where I am now in 9 months. I've read that a person of my size can safely gain about 15 pounds and have a perfectly healthy pregnancy, so that's what I'm going to aim for. I've also read that if you DO lose weight while pregnant, that the toxins stored in your fat cells can affect the baby, as can ketones in your blood from being in a constant state of low insulin (due to no carbs). I dont want either of these obviously, so the aim is healthy weight GAIN :)

Anyway, undoubtably many of you that read this will now find my posts boring... I mean this is supposed to be a weight loss blog, and although I'm not baby crazy like I was with my first, I doubt I'll have many inspiring weight loss posts......but it's ok - I forgive you all :) Hopefully I'll *see* you again next September when part 2 of my weight loss program starts up.

As a side note, we've been told that it's now quite probable that we will be relocated to Israel for my husband's work..... something I've agreed to commit to for 2 years. ACCKK!! Scary. However one of the good things about the move would be that I'd have my inlaws nearby to help me deal with 3 kids, whereas here I have no help. We're expecting an offer to be made in early Jan, and if it's satisfactory, we'll be moving in April!

Anyway, blah blah blah - hope everyone has a fantastic Xmas!!!

and HOLY CRAP!!!