theatre seats

So I went to the symphony a couple of nights ago and man I HATE those seats.... I always feel like this giant woman squished into a seat and feel like I'm overflowing... so to compensate I try to hold in my arms and try to *shrink*.... so uncomfortable in so many ways. I CANT WAIT til I dont feel the need to do this.

As for the symphony, well it was quite nice actually! Wasn't sure about it - my friend had free tickets through work, and I thought 'what the hell, it's a night out!'. I like classical music, but it was amazing to add in the human element and actually watch the musicians play their instruments... i even had a couple of goosebump moments!

Our last day of detox!

So this was the last day. Feels anticlimatic and I'm not sure what will happen tomorrow. I hope I will be able to keep myself on this path of healthy eating. I'm feeling unsure about it....a bad place to be for me as that's when *fat leslie* comes out to play - can't stand her!

Anyway, I have a great weekend lined up consisting of my book club on Friday, a pedicure on Saturday and my 'moms night out' group on Sunday so I will be trying to have fun and indulge a bit while staying on plan. Good luck to me!

Our last day of detox!

So this was the last day. Feels anticlimatic and I'm not sure what will happen tomorrow. I hope I will be able to keep myself on this path of healthy eating. I'm feeling unsure about it....a bad place to be for me as that's when *fat leslie* comes out to play - can't stand her!

Anyway, I have a great weekend lined up consisting of my book club on Friday, a pedicure on Saturday and my 'moms night out' group on Sunday so I will be trying to have fun and indulge a bit while staying on plan. Good luck to me!

the day after.....

So the fast went fantastically!! My husband and I didn't eat anything all day, but we did drink on the hour every hour - alternating between water and a special juice that's supposed to help detox. Unbelievably (REALLY unbelievably) we didn't feel hungry AT ALL all day. We planned a bunch of work to do around the house and we were active all day either working or playing with the kids, and when we went to bed at 11:30 we both looked at each other and said "it's so weird, I'm not even hungry!". The hardest part was remembering NOT to eat when making meals and snacks for Maya - it's amazing how many times you eat in a day - licking off a spoon, licking your fingers, tasting for hotness, etc etc...

I found the weirdest thing was that today I still didn't feel hungry and just didn't feel like eating. I had to force down breakfast and all day I kept forgetting that I was allowed to eat and taste things. I had really gotten into the mindset I guess! So we are now in the 3 day sequel - back to clean eating with some additional probiotic foods (yogurt and sauerkraut) to refresh the good bacteria in the stomach. As of Thursday we'll be back to 'normal' (whatever that is!) and all in all, I've lost 11 pounds and Marius 14 (course he just has to think about losing weight and he loses 5 pounds) - since last Sunday. We'll see if I can keep it off and keep going!

The book above is the detox we've being following.... AL Gittleman is the author of the Fat Flush Plan which I've found very helpful in choosing core foods to eat and supplements to take - I recommend it!

gearing up...

... for our juice fast tomorrow... yikes! I'm actually quite excited about it, but Marius isn't... keeps moaning and groaning. I've been trying to figure out WHY I'm excited, and I think it's because I've felt so in *control* of my eating this week.... and waddaya know - I really enjoy it! Every single thing I've ever put into my mouth has been a choice... so essentially I accept that I have *chosen* to be fat. Most of the time I just feel so out of control of my eating and have such crazy cravings, that to feel at peace with that part of my life is unusual but wonderful. To choose not to eat anything is pretty huge (most people just look at us weird) but maybe (just maybe) this cleanse will help get my mind prepared for the next year of (hopefully) controlled eating. Maybe one day choosing to eat well won't be such a huge deal - hopefully it will be habit. And also, hopefully choosing to eat something not-so-great won't send me into a guilt-ridden tailspinned binge!!!!

We are planning to do some spring cleaning tomorrow (and napping when the kids are napping) so that we keep busy. We'll probably do said spring cleaning separately as I predict major crankiness :)

"Thank you very much mommy"

I never knew how much my heart would swell upon hearing these words from my daughter.... I just don't know if she can get any sweeter! It's important to me that my kids are polite, but she does go a bit overboard sometimes... today she thanked me for going upstairs to get her brother ...I guess she was thankful the crying was going to end! Anyway, I'm just so proud of her and her good Canadian manners :)

On the cleanse front, today was a hard day.... could have easily have said 'screw it' and gone out for a burger or eaten all the chocolate we have on hand to reward Maya for going pee on the potty. That chocolate (smarties and mini-eggs) is sitting on the top of the fridge and usually I would have eaten it already and then probably gone out to replace it so that no one would know... however up until today I could even forget it was there. Thankfully I was able to get through the urge to eat everything in sight and stuck to the *plan*. We're gearing up for our juice fast on Sunday - I wonder how hard THAT will be?!....

I believe....

... that my body WANTS to be thin... that if I feed it the right stuff and help it along with exercise, that it will naturally metabolize and get rid of the extra fat. I feel that this theory is supported by how I'm doing right now on this cleanse as I'm eating good food, exercising and adding in a few liver and colon-cleansing foods. My stomach is smaller, I FEEL lighter, I'm not overcome with my usual cravings for sugar, my moods are even (ie: not super-bitch then nice wife in the same minute :P), I've lost a lot of inches AND I've lost 9 pounds. All this in just 5 short days.

I certainly don't expect the weight loss to continue to be this drastic, and I know I'm losing a lot because i have a LOT to lose, but it does wonders for the old psyche and self-esteem :)

Marius is out for a second night in a row..... last night out for dinner with a client and tonight out playing volleyball and is currently at the pub. However, he's not having that much fun since it's hard to find things on menus that you are 'allowed' to have. So although it's hard to be a single mom all day and night, at least I know he's not out scarfing down nachos or something :)

I'm addicted...

... to facebook! I can't get off it....and it's driving Marius crazy!! Just today I think I reunited with at least 6 people from high school that I haven't talked to in almost 20 years!! crazy

On the 'cleanse' front, I'm doing great.. I'm down another 1 1/2 pounds and my track pants are literally falling off me (of course they're really old track pants and I wore them all through my pregnancy - but still, it's nice to have pants 'falling off me'!). I can really feel that I've shrunk.. regardless of how much I weigh - I feel lighter - SUCH a great change from the bloated, full, heavy feeling I usually feel.

I don't feel hungry, in fact I don't even feel like eating most of the time. It's amazing when you eat 'clean' and cut out the junk how full you can feel. Usually I always 'feel' hungry - but I know it's a psychological hunger for sugar. Also a physiological hunger for sugar for sure, but now that I've cut it out of my diet, my body isn't craving it. Plus, I ate more today than I usually do - just all clean.

Gotta go make our special cleansing tea :) ...oh, and get back to facebook!

Day 3...

...and I still feel great! Obviously I'm craving tons... especially my sugar, but I don't really feel hungry and I've been able to put the chocolate gremlins out of my mind!!

As of this morning I have lost 7 pounds. This is quite meaningless in terms of actual weight loss because I know my body is getting rid of a lot of 'stuff' that's been stored up and anytime I reduce my calorie intake and cut out all the 'bad' stuff I experience rapid weight loss in that first week. At least no one can say it's all 'water weight' since I've been drinking over 3 litres a day!

I'm excited to see what the rest of the week brings and I feel like I've kick-started a new beginning in my weight loss journey.

2nd day...

Today I feel great!! Marius not so much - he's having major caffeine withdrawal headaches and feels really weak. I always find it interesting to see how the body heals itself when it has the chance to (when we're not shoving it full of junk). It can be uncomfortable to release all the toxins in your trillions of cells, but I've found that it's always worth it in the end. The best article I've read about this is found at: http://drbass.com/symptoms.html. It's describes what happens in your body when you detox ... what an eye-opener!

Anyway, I think I feel quite good because I've been eating healthier and avoiding sugar and refined carbs anyway (and I've never been a coffee drinker - I get my caffeine from chocolate!), and so I'm not experiencing as many symptoms as Marius. Plus I'm eating a lot so I don't feel hungry. However I have to say that those darn chocolate easter eggs that my Aunt gave my daughter yesterday are calling my name. For me not to eat them is a feat in itself, so I'll just celebrate that today :)

Cleaning 'house'

So my husband and I started a 2 week cleanse today... figured we're doing a huge spring clean and de-cluttering of the house this month, why not include our bodies! It's not a very hard one as you eat healthy while adding in some liver and colon-cleansing foods and then don't eat any sugar, sweeteners, alcohol, gluten, wheat, refined carbs, fats (except olive and flax oil) and dairy. Surprisingly, there's still a lot of choice and we're not feeling hungry. My husband's been interested in doing one for a while but I couldnt as I was still breastfeeding.. now that Matt has decided that 'breast is NOT best'! i'm free to do anything I want to my body!

I'm really excited about this... i'm hoping it will kick-start further weight loss and get me on the right path. I've done them before and I always feel so great and 'clean' afterward.

I'm also finally ordered my Treadclimber on Thursday and I'm SO excited.. I find it so hard to get out and exercise with 2 kids, and being able to do it at home will be so convenient.

My eating has been terrible these past few weeks so here's hoping I get back on track!